Expectations and Happiness

So well said! This is a huge issue popping up right now for many people. If you find yourself becoming disappointed or devastated by situations or people not meeting your expectations, then this post is for you. Blessed Be! Find and be the blessing, because it’s there somewhere …

Cauldron and Brew: A Witch's Blog

So a few days ago I attended an e-class on intuition hosted by the Flora Sage Therapies Institute. I was so excited for two reasons: I had the day off so I could attend free of interruptions (my office is in a very public space) and it was free. The course advert also said there would be a special announcement just for people on the call. I assumed it was an announcement for a new program or something. Anywho, so I am in this class and the material is super good and I feel like I am learning some valuable things (example, clairsalience is a thing, who knew!).

there-are-ways-to-be-happy-improve-your-reality-or-lower-your-expectations-quote-1 Source: http://www.picturequotes.com/expectations-quotes

And then about halfway through the class

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8 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by diana allen on February 19, 2016 at 9:33 pm

    A couple weeks ago I was having lunch with a friend and she shared with me that in general, she has “really low expectations” of other people. I was so surprised! But she said someone once told her that people with lower expectations are happier than people with high expectations, and she too it to heart.

    Logically, I suppose this makes perfect sense. I’ve been happier in certain relationships after I decreased my expectations of the person. (I may think the relationship would be more fulfilling, for me anyway, if the other person WANTED to meet my expectations, but accepting that they didn’t allowed us to continue the friendship.) On the other hand, I think it’s important to know your own limits of what is and is not acceptable. You don’t have to go too low. Boundaries are a beautiful thing.

    xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I agree, Diana, “Boundaries are a beautiful thing”! For me, that goes into the creating a new reality department: if people don’t meet my expectations of how I expect to be treated, then I downgrade their involvement in my life. I have layers upon layers of relationships, relatively few of which I consider fully mutual. In order to maintain a sense of balance, my relationships either involve some kind of supplementary energy exchange such as payment from clients, or I have categories of friends like “gardening friends” or “vegan lunchtime friends.” If someone expects something from me that is just so far above and beyond what I would ever consider asking from them or what I consider them capable of offering in terms of depth or understanding, then I might choose to gift that to them — under special circumstances, at my discretion — but to go on pretending that such relationships are balanced would be a toxic disservice to me, so I remove myself.

    I know this is a common theme among many people who live from a place of service, compassion and assistance. There’s a difference between charity work, paid work, what we consider casual acquaintances, and true blue friends. For me, the true blue friends are the ones who live from a similar level of awareness and generosity as I do. I expect very few people to live from that place, so I create and maintain my boundaries with that awareness. Every once in a great while, someone surprises me by moving from a lesser level of friendship into full on potential to live from that space. When I see that, those people move into the true blue friend category –not because I need them to, but because I recognize the commonality of experience and depth. Recognizing the different levels of consciousness and compassion, and honoring those differences without feeling guilty for “judging” others has greatly improved my own happiness quotient over the years! I have such low expectations from most people — while still always seeing their potential — that I’m constantly pleased and surprised when people do step up more into the fullness of who they are. 🙂

    Thanks for your comment!

    xx

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  3. Ah. I think that the woman Diana is referring to has heard part of the 4 Noble Truths teaching of Buddha. As I understand it, this expectation thing has to do with us creating our own suffering. It is a holding on to that which we want, and then not getting it creates suffering. I think it is being confused as often presented in quick quotes. I once told a friend who was very upset with her family for not planning and creating a big birthday part for her, to not expect them to do so if she has not made it known that it is what she would like. It is nearly impossible for her family to have known she wanted a party, much less of the magnitude of size and expense that she complained about to me. To create expectations for others to ‘be’ or ‘do’ something for us is creating self-suffering. It’s not always about lowering expectations, but if you want to have them, but communicating them as well. It is my belief that if I am going to have expectations, they better be of myself and reasonable at that!

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  4. Too funny, Ella, I felt your comment come through and was like, “Hmmm, better check comments, because Ella just left one.” And of course, there it was! Agreed on those observations!

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  5. Ha! Do you suppose a lot of these folks, suffering with this now, are confused in that they don’t need to ‘expect’ but to ‘accept’? And this ‘judging’ taboo….jeez, it’s really not about playing God, it’s about being able to choose what feels right for oneself, according to one’s preferences…and those really do not need to be explained either. I think our word are all jumbled!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Yes! People are so out of touch with their own preferences. Between religions, public education and the PC police, very few people have any idea what they prefer until their body starts screaming at them that they cannot take the alternative scenario anymore. Even then, they feel guilty for choosing otherwise. It’s a huge topic during medical intuitive sessions and rather shocking just how many people say that given a choice between having horrific symptoms or saying no to unreasonable people in their lives, many of them find it much easier to suffer the symptoms than the wrath (or perceived wrath — but oftentimes very real wrath does follow when people begin to assert boundaries).

    Our words are all jumbled, and as a result, so is our world!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Cheers interesting post. Many thanks for sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

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